Got Bread?

I have a friend who claims that she enjoys baking. Though, oddly enough, over the last 5 years, her oven has been used to produce baked goods maybe twice. (Oh, let's give her the benefit of the doubt and say thrice).

Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining, as it actually gives me good material for comic fodder. But I ran across this image on the web the other day, and it made me laugh out loud.

Peaches, if your reading this, know that I am thinking of you!

Rainn

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Brian McPherson: Canadian Tire Money Mogul

This week, and Edmonton Man, Brian McPherson fulfilled a 15 year dream to purchase a lawn tractor entirely with Canadian Tire money.

McPherson, 29, had been saving Canadian Tire money for 15 years, since he bought a hockey stick at the iconic Canadian retailer as a teen-ager. At that time, McPherson had received 10 cents in Canadian Tire money for his purchase, and a dream was born.

"I thought it'd be a good idea to save up all the money, and buy what at the time was the most expensive thing in the store, which was a riding lawn mower." said McPherson.

And so save he did. For 15 years, McPherson saved the Canadian Tire money from purchases on gas, household items, and well, anything else one can buy at Canadian Tire.

So a few weeks back, the McPherson family knew they were getting close to hitting their goal, and decided to count their dollars and cents. Sure enough, they had $1053 in Canadian Tire money. They bundled the money and took it to the store in a brief case.

Several local news outlets showed McPherson using his new lawn tractor on his yard. It's not a yard that really needs a lawn tractor, and McPherson does already own a standard push mower. When asked why he didn't choose to buy something else with the money, McPherson thought that would be ridiculous.

"This is one of those things that you set the goal (when you're a kid) and told your friends and family about what you were saving this ridiculous amount of Canadian Tire money for."

The Canadian Tire store manager, Bruce Duvander said he has worked for the company for 20 years, and only ever seen a similar amount of money redeemed once before.

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Canadian Tire Money Fun Facts:

- Originally introduced in 1958

- The man's face on the front of the notes are a fictional character named "Sandy McTire"

- Over the last 50 years, there have been at least 19 different denominations of Canadian Tire money in circulation. Several of the denominations have been discontinued.

- Was at one time considered a form of legal tender for users of the Canadian E-Bay website, if the seller was willing to accept it.

- In 2004, several customers using an ATM machine at a CIBC branch in Moncton, New Brunswick were dispensed no less than 11 bills of Canadian Tire money instead of actual currency. The bank compensated the customers accordingly.

- In the mid 1990's, a German man was caught with $11,000,000 of counterfeit Canadian Tire money. The fakes were recovered before he was able to fly to Canada to redeem them.

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Fish Pedicures Banned By BC Health Authority

The BC Health Authority has done an apparent about-face on a decision it made last year, to allow spa owner Dixie Simpson to offer "fish pedicures".

Fish pedicures are a popular procedure in which clients place their feet in pools of water containing Garra Rufa rish. The fish are similar in size to minnows. They do not have teeth, but gulp up dead skin cells off the customer's feet.

The practise was first popularized in Turkey, as a means of alleviating the symptoms of psoriasis and eczema. In more recent years, it has become a popular feature in spas world wide, including France, Japan and the UK.

Dixie Simpson first began offering the service in her spa in Duncan, BC last year. She says she contacted the health authority to ensure everything was above board. The health authority gave her the go ahead.

But, in the last few weeks, the BC Health Authority has changed their mind, stating that the practise is not sanitary, despite the fact that Dixie uses UV filtration systems. The health authority feels there are potential chances for bacterial infections to be passed on from one customer to another, and so, they have since classified the Garra Rufa fish as "tools" of the spa owner. Under BC law, any "tools" used in a spa must be sterilized between customers.

Obviously, since they are live fish, it is impossible to sterilize them without killing them.

Dixie says that she will have no choice but to shut down if she can't use her fish for foot therapy.

The actual real risk is patients is low if not negligible. Why not just insist that the spa operators have customers read and sign a waiver stating the risks and reducing the liability of the spa owner?

Frankly, if your not allowed to dip your feet in a pool with harmless fish that can be found in spas around the world, one has to question the amount of government control being exorcised.

BIZARRE: UK Man Adds Wife To Terror Watch List

A recent news report out of the UK describes a bizarre case in which an Immigration Official secretly added his own wife's name onto the nation's terror watch list.

The man's wife was visiting her family in Pakistan at the time. While there, the man illegally accessed government databases to add his wife's name onto the no-fly list.

Upon trying to board a flight from Pakistan to London, the woman was told she would not be allowed to board the flight, but was not given a reason why. Naturally, since her husband was an immigration official, she promptly called him asking for help. The man told his wife he would try to find out what was going on, but instead, left her stranded in Pakistan for 3 years.

UK officials stated that in the government's database, the woman was described as "not being in the good of the public" to allow her into the country.

How the man explained the lack of his wife's presence for 3 years has not been explained, but sources say the man had "the time of his life" while his wife was away. Eventually, the man applied for a promotion in which a routine background check shed light on what he had done. Officials then confronted him and he confessed. He was immediately fired.

Bizarre: Bristol Palin's Bad Dancing Triggers Police Standoff

Authorities in the town of Vermont, Wisconsin ended up in an overnight standoff that ended Tuesday morning with a 67 year old man turning himself in.

Court papers filed by the Dane County Sheriff's office say that Steven Cowan became so enraged by Bristol Palin's dance routine on an episode of Dancing With The Stars, that he loaded his shotgun, blasted his TV, then turned the gun on his elderly wife. She managed to escape unharmed. Cowan then held police at bay overnight before giving himself up in the morning.

Court documents went on to explain that Cowan did not think that Palin was a good dancer, and was convinced she was still on the show only because of her famous mother, former Governor Sarah Palin.

Cowan has been charged with second degree reckless endangerment, and if convicted, could spend up to ten years in jail. This would be unlikely however, as it has been noted in court documents that Cowan suffers from bipolar disorder.

Man Dies of Caffeine Overdose

In April of this year, a 23 year old British man, Michael Lee Bedford died of caffeine overdose, after eating 2 teaspoons of pure caffeine while at a party then washing it down with an energy drink.

According to health authorities after his autopsy, it was believed that the amount of caffeine he ingested was the equivalent to 70 red bulls. 70!

Party goers swore statements that they seen a friend of the man give him the powder. Apparently the caffeine powder was purchased online for $5.38. The original packaging specifically stated not to consume more than 1/16th of a teaspoon, but it is unclear if the powder was given to Bedford in the original packaging or not.

The death was apparently quite violent and unpleasant (as one would expect) but this week police have officially ruled his death as accidental.

Randy Quaid: When Bad Actors Do Bad Things

Randy Quaid Looking All Craaaaazzzzzy

I am not one who typically cares about Hollywood gossip, but I have got to say: What the hell is wrong with these people?

Every second week when I read the news, it seems there is some description of bizarre and illegal activities of Randy Quaid and his wife, Evi.

In case you have forgotten, last September, the Quaids had been arrested for failing to pay a $10,000 hotel bill. As I recall, Randy was said to be quite cavalier and insistent about not paying for the bill. They had been arrested, with a court date set, and the couple failed to show up to court, having fled to Texas. Warrants for their arrest as well as a request for extradition from Texas had been submitted.

Finally, they were re-arrested, with a new court date set, of which they failed to appear not once, but thrice!

Hello?? Anyone home? Do you not realize that failure to appear multiple times is not going to help your cause any? Did they think that the matter would simply go away if they didn't show up? Maybe the Quaids thought "oh ya, the State of California will get bored with this and forget about it."

As though all that was not strange in its own right, in September of this year, the Quaids were again arrested. This time for burglary and trespassing. Apparently the couple broke into a house that they formerly owned in Santa Barbara and were, well, squatting. There were also reports of vandalism of the property.

The story gets weirder. Randy Quaid claimed the house had been unlawfully transferred to a third party illegally by a woman who forged the Quaids signature on real estate documents. They claim her name is Rhonda Quaid.

Simple solution right? Simply find Rhonda and ask for answers, right? Nope. Rhonda is now dead. Don't ask me how, as I have no idea. Perhaps we should be looking for a murder weapon in the Quaids suitcases??

At any rate, the Crazy Quaids AGAIN failed to show up for court, and new arrest warrants were issued.

To top it all off, Today, the Quaids were arrested in Vancouver, for violating the Canadian Immigration Act. Most likely because they fled to Canada with outstanding warrants for their arrest in California. Duh. Did they think that Canadian and US Boarder Services does not share that information with each other?? Though it does make one wonder how they were allowed into Canada to begin with. Did they swim to Canada, thereby bypassing Customs?

The Quaids have been arrested more times in a year than Lindsay Lohan has been sent to rehab. Thats pretty bad.

I think they both need a serious psychological evaluation. And stop letting them out on bail, for crying out loud!

Lobe Licker at Large

So in a bit of bizarre news today, police in St. Catharines, Ontario are on the hunt for a man who assaulted a Dollar Store employee by licking her ear.

According to reports, a man went into a My Dollar Shop, purchased several cans of spray paint, and left the store. He came back about 5 minutes later, motioned to the female clerk to lean closer to him, then allegedly licked her ear and began whispering sexual comments to her.

When a male coworker approached, the man fled the store. He is described as being a very tall black male, between 6'2" and 6'5" with a shaved head and wearing a green and white stripped sport jacket.

Seriously? Whatever happened to the day where sexual assault used to just be an inappropriate slap on the behind? Not that I am condoning that either, but licking a strangers ear? Gross.

I recommend the women in St. Catharines wear ear muffs for the foreseeable future until this man is apprehended.

Man Pleasures Himself in Wal-Mart Toy Dept

Ok, So this was just too bizarre not to post.

The picture you see is an actual mug shot of 28 year old William Tyler Black. Black allegedly went into his local Florida Wal-Mart, grabbed the latest Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition. He then took the magazine into the Toy Department and pleasured himself to completion. The article further alleges that when he had finished, um, playing with HIS toy, that he wiped his hands on a child's toy which was on a nearby shelf.

Police have levied a series of charges on Black.

While I agree that the man needs help and SHOULD be arrested, I think the last charge of Battery On A Child may be reaching for straws. Police felt that the charge was reasonable, as they concluded it was possible that a child may have come into contact "with the fluid on the toy".

In any case, I guess Wal-Mart really DOES have everything.